I don’t even like summer my selfies are bad I have no social life and Ihave made more lattes than any person should ever make in 3 months. lord please end my suffering
wow my mom and my aunt are literally the rudest and most passive aggressive people I’ve ever met it’s really cool
Wow so first off I’m really grateful to have a job and I’m glad it’s something cool like making coffee.
BUT I work way too much and I am SO lonely. I think that’s the biggest thing. Besides being super tired and having to act peppy when I feel like I’m going to cry and or pass out…being lonely is the worst. I miss my friends. I hate small talk and I hate being alone in that shop all day every day. I feel like I’m losing myself in the rush of things. That sounds really stupid and over dramatic…but this entire summer has just been go go go. No time to stop and think and just be with myself. I need that..I am writing now because it usually helps when I feel like this. Spring was so full of growth and joy. Summer is work. Just work and that’s it. And when school starts…it’ll be school and work. God it makes me want to cry just thinking about it. I don’t want to be a grown up. Is this what life is? Forever? Will it always be this stressful? Will I forever be stuck in a constant state of burnt out? This morning I went to my 8-10 helper shift and I felt so sick the whole time. Nauseous and sore and aching all over. It felt like the walk to my car took a thousand years and then when I got there I realized that I had locked my keys in. I started sobbing uncontrollably and I called my mom to come get me while I sat in the back of the truck and cried. I was sick and I only had 2 hours until I had to go back ALL DAY. I usually get off a little before 10. It was like the keys being in there just made it all too much. To top it off I kept feeling more and more nauseous. I got someone to cover my closing shift and just slept all day. How cool that my only day off in a long time was filled with tears and being sick.